6 Jerza Moments and How They Should've Gone
by insanemonkeyboy
Summary: So pretty straightforward. This is just a rewrite of 6 Jellal and Erza moments that were meant to be romantic but totally were anything but. Can't really call it a Jerza fic - well, maybe a one-sided Jerza. More like a short rant. After this it's back to my regular stories :D


**I don't own Fairy Tail or the characters. Mashima owns them. If I owned them, the scenes you are about to read would be canon (well, the basic gist of them at least).

So this is a quick one shot of some key "Jerza" moments from Fairy Tail, and how they would've gone if Hiro Mashima weren't for some god-knows-what reason so intent on creating a love story that's worse than any fairy tale.**

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 **1\. Slaves in the tower of heaven.**

"My name is Erza."

"What's your last name?"

"I don't have a last name."

"Well that's no good. You can't not have a last name. How about I give you one?"

"What the fuck is wrong with you? I'm a traumatized little girl who was made a slave and now you're telling me there's something wrong with me just because I don't have a last name? Get away from me you piece of shit. Hopefully one day I'll find a _real_ friend who doesn't care about the fact that I don't have a last name."

"But… I was gonna' be all romantic and cool and give you a last name that matches your hair color. Erza Scarlet. You were gonna' be Erza Scarlet?"

"How is that romantic and cool? Did it ever cross your mind that I just might have a real family out there somewhere that actually knows my real last name? Who the fuck are you to be deciding what my last name should be? And how is it romantic to say something's wrong with me not having a last name just so you can 'fix' it by giving me a fake last name. You're nothing but an arrogant prick."

"But I thought we had something…"

"Well you thought wrong."

 **2\. At the Magic Council Trial**

"Oh yeah, that guy Siegrain. His real name is Jellal. I don't know what he's up to, but last time I saw him he was bent on rebuilding the tower of heaven and resurrecting Zeref. You might want to look into that."

"You shouldn't have said anything Erza. Now I'm going to destroy Fairy Tail."

"No, you just said that right in front of the magic council. Good luck destroying Fairy Tail from prison."

"Oh shit."

 **3\. Tower of Heaven Arc**

Ok, I don't really have any dialogue for this arc, but what the fuck was with that? "OMG I STILL WANT TO LOVE YOU JELLAL BECAUSE YOU TRIED TO ACT ALL COOL WHEN WE WERE KIDS AND GAVE ME A LAST NAME BECAUSE APPARENTLY YOU COULDN'T ACCEPT ME WITHOUT ONE. I DON'T CARE THAT YOU TURNED ALL MY FRIENDS AGAINST ME AND MURDERED LOTS OF PEOPLE AND BUILT THIS TOWER THAT WAS THE CAUSE OF ALL OUR PAIN IN THE FIRST PLACE."

*Puke, puke, puke*

On to the next arc…

 **4\. Oracion Seis Arc**

"The only thing I can remember is a name…. Erza."

"Well, if that's true then how do you remember the spell you were just using to destroy Nirvana?"

"Oh. I guess I remember that stuff too. But seriously. All I can remember is the name Erza. That's you, right?"

"Yeah, well how's this for memories? You kicked me out of the tower where we were slaves when we were children, told me if I came back you would kill all my friends, and then went and told my friends I betrayed them so they would hate me. Then, years later, you tried to sacrifice me to resurrect Zeref and killed the one friend from that time that tried to protect me from you. So if you're looking for props for remembering my name, you're shit out of luck buddy. You don't get a free pass just because you have some kind of fucking amnesia."

 **5\. Jellal's Punishment**

"For his crimes against mankind, Fiore, and the Council, Jellal Fernandez is now sentenced to death."

"Whaaaaat? I thought you were just going to put me in prison for a long time where I could magically break all spell barriers and express my love for the woman I betrayed and tried to kill and then later get broken out by some other mages to atone for my crimes by hunting down people who are just like I am – I mean used to be."

"Yeah, what dream world do you live in buddy? You think this is a fairy tale or something?"

"…. Mommy."

 **6\. On the beach**

"So let me get this straight. You broke out of prison to 'atone' for your crimes in your own way and nothing that happened was really your fault because you were under someone else's control. And now you're the good guy who's on the run from the council because you're a victim of their continued judgment of your actions before that weren't really your fault."

"Pretty much."

"I don't ever want to see you again. I'm going back to find Natsu now."

"What? But… what about us?..."

"Jellal, let's set a few things straight here. You betrayed me, betrayed my friends, killed one of my best friends who was a far better man than you, tried to sacrifice me to resurrect the man known as the most evil mage in history, and after you were caught you broke out of the council prison. Before that you tried to act all cool and tough, told me there was something wrong with me because I didn't have a last name, and tried to force one on me. What did you think I was going to do when I saw you again, try to kiss you or something?"

"…Maybe?"

"What kind of dream world do you live in?"

"Why do people keep saying that to me?"

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Alright. I think this is my last one shot for the weekend. I was really struggling to write my other stories and this was just sitting there on my mind. So anyway, I'll try to post an update to "The Size of His Heart" by next weekend, and "Fiery Jade" by the end of the weekend. Then I'll start working on the next chapter of "Lost," which will also be the point at which I close the poll and decide the pairing, so don't forget to cast your vote!


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